You ever wonder how some Moms just seem to have it all together. But if we are really honest with ourselves, we know that every mom struggles with something. Each of our struggles (including me) comes from different areas of our lives, and it is up to us to make improvement to the best we can. I would have to say, one of the worst is to be defeated by our children. We just have to slow down, take a deep breath, and be honest with ourselves. Find the root of the problem and tackle it. Today, I am introducing to you our 10 day challenge to becoming a better team together.
Join others and see how your relationship with your children will become healthier, happier and with purpose. You will not only notice a change with your children and the bond between the two of you, but also within yourself. As we start the challenge, remember to stay focus primarily on the first challenge. With each day following focus on the new challenge, along with the previous challenges. Enjoy this time together with your children and have some fun as you discover new ways to be present with each other 😊
- Be Consistent
Whenever possible, try to stick to a schedule as best you can. I know sometimes this is impossible but do it on the days that you can. It is very important for kids to have consistency and stability. even if it’s as simple as a book before bed every night, or a kiss first thing in the morning.
- Every morning- Greet your children with positivity
First thing in the morning… make sure the first thing you say to your children is something positive and nice when they wake up.
- Good morning, how did you sleep? (I say this one a lot myself)
- I love you, are you ready for breakfast
- Are you ready for a great day?
- Before bedtime- End on a good note with much tender, love and care
Every night before the children goes to bed, give them a big hug and tell them you love them. Thank them for being good that day and if they weren’t good, tell them to get a good night sleep so they can do better the next day.
- Be GRATEFUL for every good thing they do
Often times, I would be hanging out with my children and I would feel a gush of gratitude towards them for being THEM and for the things that they do. These are the moments when I grab their attention and look them in the eyes and tell them how much I love them and that I am grateful for them.
Start a Gratitude journal with your children and write down these moments. Be sure to include something about your day that made you feel grateful of them.
- Listen to them – Really listen
When your kids are trying to tell you something, stop what you’re doing and look them in the eyes, and listen. Let them know that you’re interested in their stories and answer every question. Yes, every single question. The silly ones, the hard ones, even the ones you don’t have a real answer to. Don’t ever ask them to stop asking questions because it is a great thing that they want to learn. That spark of fire to discover will help shape the person they are becoming. If you really don’t have an answer, just say… “That’s a great question, but I’m not sure. Maybe we can find out together”.
- Teach them accountability and responsibility
There’s no such thing as they are too young to learn what accountability and responsibility is. In fact, it is quite the opposite. When you introduce, explain and show them at an early age how to be responsible, they learn to be more honest within themselves and make the right choices. They will give less excuses of why they didn’t follow your guidance and own up to their mistakes and be accountable for the consequences. For every action there is a reaction.
- Ask them to help you with something – and Praise them
Give some house chores (appropriate for their age) to your children and ask them to hep you complete them by a certain time. You will be getting great help as they build confidence knowing they accomplished a task…. And the reward is the Praise you will be giving them. Praise is a much more meaningful reward than buying them a toy or giving them money.
- Reduce the use of technology, for you and your children
We have a ‘no device before breakfast or after dinner’ rule at our home for the kids. They have a hard time setting limits at a young age, so you need to be direct at how much time and perhaps even give them a time block during the day where they can be on their devices or the ‘no device’ during meal times together.
We have to lead by example and I know it can be very tempting, but if you need to get on your phone give yourself a certain time limit, 5 or 10 minutes, and then put it down and do something with the kids. Technology is taking over young minds; we must lead by example if we want them to spend less time playing video games and watching tv. Challenge yourself to avoid it whenever possible.
- Teach them new skills
Kids learn and absorb like a sponge. It doesn’t have to be something complex but teaching them something simple can be both fun and useful for them. Remember to praise them for learning it and continue to practice it with them for the rest of the day. Be consistent. Whatever that you choose, continue to work on their developing skills every day, so they can retain it better.
Some ideas:
- Do yoga
- Learn sign language
- Make their own sandwich
- Open the door for others
- Do laundry
- Quality Time – Spending one on one time with each child
There is a difference between spending quality time together with your children than just spending time and hanging out. Spending quality time should be intentional with a purpose in mind and giving your child your 100% attention. It means to do something the two of you enjoy together. Simply spending time can be just being in the same room while one is watching TV, the other is playing games on the phone, while you’re on your computer doing some work. This is not QUALITY time, so be sure to note the difference. Make it purposeful and make your time together worthwhile. They are only at this age once. Try spending one on one time with each child. They have different interests and different levels of comprehension. When you just spend time with one of them at a time, you are ensuring that you are truly giving them your 100% attention and that time it’s about you two.
TIP: Try to do this challenge with a mommy friend and hold each other accountable for completing each day! When you accomplish the whole 10 Day challenge, be sure to celebrate 🙂